Who is actually responsible inside your company

The feeling of hitting a wall

When a conflict at work escalates, the obvious question becomes: who do I actually go to? In many companies there's no clear answer, and that uncertainty often feels worse than the original conflict itself.

You call HR, get pointed to the works council, who says it's really a matter for your manager - and by the end you've had three conversations and made no progress at all. That back-and-forth is exhausting and often leaves people feeling abandoned.

On top of that comes the worry that raising a complaint might put your own position at risk. Will I be seen as difficult now? Could this be used against me? Those fears aren't unfounded, even though in many individual cases they don't end up materialising.

It helps to recognise that the confusion you're experiencing is often a structural problem within the company - not a sign that your concern isn't important enough to be dealt with.

This isn't just your private problem

Under German occupational health and safety law, employers are required to assess workplace hazards - explicitly including psychosocial risks such as conflict and bullying. Handling this is therefore a company responsibility, not purely a matter of individual character or something you're expected to sort out entirely on your own.

At the same time, the European ESENER-3 company survey found that in Germany, only 38 percent of companies have a procedure for handling bullying or harassment, and just 31 percent among small businesses. So if nobody can tell you what the process looks like, that's often about the company, not about you.

These figures also explain why so many employees feel like they're reinventing the wheel when trying to sort out their situation: in many cases, an established path genuinely doesn't exist yet, and you might be one of the first people asking for one.

That doesn't mean you have to design a procedure yourself. It means it's entirely legitimate to actively ask who is responsible - and that having to ask more than once isn't rude, it's sometimes simply the only way to get an answer at all.

Separating fact from assumption before you reach out

Before contacting any point of contact, it's worth sorting for yourself what you know for certain, what you suspect, and what is simply worry. That protects you from dumping everything at once under pressure in a conversation and losing the thread.

A useful intermediate step is describing the situation in three or four sentences, as you would explain it to someone outside your workplace who knows nothing about it. If that summary consists mostly of feelings, that's a sign more concrete facts still need gathering.

Ask yourself, too, what outcome you actually want: clarification of someone's behaviour, a team change, a formal investigation, or, for now, simply being heard? That distinction helps you find the right point of contact, since not every office can handle every type of request.

Also sort out what you've already tried - such as a clarifying conversation with the person involved - versus what's still open. Contact points will almost always ask what steps have already been taken.

Mapping the possible points of contact

Depending on the company, options might include the works council, an HR representative, a representative for employees with disabilities, an equal opportunities officer, the occupational physician, or an external counselling service. It helps to think in advance about what you want from a conversation: information, confidentiality, or a formal process.

The works council has statutory co-determination rights around occupational health and safety and can often mediate without immediately triggering a formal procedure. HR, on the other hand, tends to be closer to disciplinary or contractual matters - which also means information shared there is more likely to end up in your personnel file.

The occupational physician is bound by medical confidentiality and can be a good first point of contact if your primary concern right now is your health rather than launching a formal case against someone. External counselling services are often affiliated with an industry body or union and sit outside the internal hierarchy, which can make a first conversation feel easier for some people.

It's entirely reasonable to ask about confidentiality before sharing any details. That's not rude - it's sensible preparation, and it's a question any serious point of contact should be able to answer without hesitation.

What a first conversation can actually look like

A first conversation with a point of contact doesn't have to mean everything starts moving immediately. You can explicitly say: 'Today I'd like to understand how your process works before I go into detail.' That's a completely legitimate first step.

One possible opening: 'I've been experiencing a situation on my team that's been affecting me. Before I go into detail, I'd like to know: what happens with what I tell you, and who else finds out?' That question establishes clarity before you make yourself vulnerable.

Where possible, bring a short, factual summary with you - not to read aloud, but so you don't lose your train of thought under pressure. This helps especially if the conversation becomes emotional.

At the end of the conversation, it's worth asking clearly what happens next: what concretely happens, by when, and who follows up with whom? Without that clarity, it often stays unclear whether anything is actually moving.

What's better to avoid

Avoid sharing the same story informally with many different people across the company at the same time, such as several colleagues in addition to the official contact point. That can let information circulate in ways you can't control and cost you ownership over your own story.

Avoid letting a single dismissive reaction discourage you entirely. Precisely because many companies lack an established procedure, the first person you approach may genuinely not be the right one, or may simply feel out of their depth.

Avoid assuming confidentiality without asking about it explicitly. Some roles are legally or organisationally required to pass certain information on - you should know that beforehand, not discover it afterwards.

And avoid feeling you need to justify asking, as though it were an imposition. Raising a concern about psychological strain at work is a legitimate part of occupational health and safety, not a special request.

Where the limits of internal responsibility lie

Internal contact points can mediate, investigate and sometimes trigger organisational changes - but they cannot issue legally binding rulings on misconduct. If dismissal, discrimination, or a potential claim is involved, that's a different, legal path.

If health consequences appear - sleep problems, anxiety symptoms, exhaustion - that calls for medical or psychotherapeutic support, regardless of how the internal process turns out. Both can run in parallel; one doesn't replace the other.

This article offers orientation, not legal advice. For questions about deadlines, protection against dismissal, or possible discrimination, the right next step is an employment lawyer or a recognised external counselling service.

What's realistic to expect

Even in companies with an established process, clarification often takes longer than you'd like - several conversations, sometimes weeks. That's frustrating, but it doesn't automatically mean nothing is happening.

It's realistic to expect that, after your first contact, you'll at least understand what the next steps look like, even if a substantive resolution is still pending. That clarity alone is progress compared with the feeling of hitting a wall.

In smaller companies without a formal process, you may need to show more initiative yourself, for example by actively asking who handles occupational health and safety. That distribution of effort isn't fair, but it doesn't change the fact that taking that initiative can still be worth it for you.

One small next step

Today, find out which of the contact points mentioned above actually exist at your company - often a quick look at the intranet or a short question to a colleague is enough. You don't need to contact anyone yet.

Then write down just one sentence: what do you want to know from that contact point first, before you share anything about yourself? That's the only step you need today.